As the world completes another orbit around the sun and the beings that live on it mark the passage of time from that relative coordinate again, so the year two thousand and fifteen has arrived. The actual year is 4,543,265,993. P'raps you're reading this on this very day, hair smelling like cigarette smoke and teeth loose from gum recession. P'raps you're reading this in fifty years time as part of a school project on data archeology. P'raps you're reading this a billion years into the future, a little zig emanating from a long dead planet. Whatever your temporal orientation, this is authored from the point of view of a humble humanoid casting a face back and a face forth, Janusian pattern recognition in full effect.
What was 2014? Turn it down for hdyoutube soul blast misanthropic pre-futurist iphone asteroid landing robin williams world cup farage missing planes cumberbatch nude photo ebola fracking ice bucket isis extravaganza, to sum it up. Each decade in the 20th century had a certain flavour and yet 15% through this century and the only thing to tell old from new is the resolution of the image.
"Dreams are the subconscious desire of unexplored parapraxis in order to avoid taboo. Does wish fulfilment lead to ritual; Cave paintings, hieroglyphics, theatre of the cavemen, painting, television; Fictions that could be entertainment but also an allegory or metaphor. The modern language of media is through homage and cliché, repetition, the simulation of media that has come before in order to remind you of the original and that you are watching fiction. In our imagination we may picture our minds filled with homunculus' who walk around the estates of our memory. Although this is affected by photography, as an individual perspective on the world around us we choose to remember the photograph of. We edit the photographs of reality for sharing in order to stroke our digital ego; it itself an extension of us on the World wide web, technology has invaded life so subtly as to appear normal. But is satisfaction through materialism just a distraction? Capitalist industry is a system that isn't reflected in nature, it is one of such extreme complexity and asymmetry that it can not be predicted currently. Death." - Russell Brand, thinker of 2014
January
The bitterest month, in memoriam ex mento that 2015 will be remembered as a year that happened in the past in which the present history will say have had a series of events occur that would lead to developments in the future. The main one being a series of attacks from sensitives. There was an experiment done in 1987 in which an area of forest was cordoned off and a deer introduced every hour. They found that within a certain amount, the area divided by the population and then multiplied, was the overpopulation sweet spot. The forest could adequately hold sixty deer, so that each had enough space that they didn't display any signs of aggression towards the self or others. At one hundred and twenty deer some individuals began to attack those nearby or begin to mutilate themselves. After two weeks just over three hundred deer had been stuffed into the forest. Scientists watched from observation platforms in the tree tops waves of pain ripple across the backs of the deer. Some would knock their head from side to side, biting at the ears of its neighbour as they tried to find their footing on the dead below. Although humanity hasn't yet reached this badness, the same applies in a psychic sense. The brain is constantly bombarded with information and so drives certain people to undertake terrorist attacks in order to decrease the population back to a more manageable state. Towards of the end of January scientists will make this breakthrough discovery and completely change every single language into the same one in which the only word of the language is 'oyo'. This leads to a massive decrease in communication complexity and and nobody ever kills anyone again.
February
As the soft jelly snow of January melts, so do the ice caps. For a few weeks they reveal an extraordinary scene, a pair of fish dinosaurs battling underwater are frozen in perfect condition. News helicopters constantly circle the glimpse into the past as the bizarre sepulchre breaks away from the glacier and heads towards America, slowly melting as it travels. Just as it reaches the Statue of Liberty the two huge creatures come back to life after being struck by lightning and continue their prehistoric death duel in the Hudson Bay.
March
The true beginning of the year is of course in Spring. And Spring definitely 'springs' into action as an enormous spring escapes from a factory and begins to bounce away, getting higher and higher with each tumble. The curious nature of this super spring is the material it's made from; graphene. The wonder-material is thought to be of such vital importance in the years ahead due to its resilience, lightness and abundance. The only unforeseen property of this material is that anything made out of it will cause chaos and destruction. The giant spring therefore leaves a trail of misery out of Manchester as it begins its travel across England, the eighty tonne juggernaut is unable to be stopped by conventional means until it is captured inside a graphene containment cube. Although as this is also made out of graphene, the containment cube also manages to trap most of Wakefield inside as well.
April
The newest internet sensation begins in April that is copied by billions. In order for something to be popular it requires that people can show off in some way with the least amount of effort. With the 'Necknomination' craze that swept the web people could show off drinking, so followed the 'Ice Bucket Challenge' in which people could do something wacky whilst being naked. The next logical conclusion is the 'Oil Aboard' in which a number of people oil themselves up and then try to pile of top of each other. This also follows the liquid theme pervading the fads as people love water. They also love goo, and so 'Oil Aboard' is an instant success enjoyed by all. Laugh as people not thought of as attractive try it. Lust over sexy people doing it. Wince as painful accidents occur. Like all fads this will die out after eight weeks, although the thing it will be replaced by in 2016 will be so wonderful it will definitely be worth the wait.
May
The 2015 General Election will be a series of 'gaffs' as politicians are meant to act like humans but can't pull it off properly. Names will be called. People will cry. The entire political landscape for the rest of the decade lies in the hands of a racist pensioner again. But from the smoke will rise a champion, forged in the heat of battle. Ed Milliband will walk through the palace of blood to sit atop the throne of skulls, upon his head he will wear a crown of tears as he looks out on his kingdom, expressionless. Inside his head he dreams he is hiding in the dark, naked and afraid, but that is just a dream. He summons a servant boy with the flick of a wrist and demands that the NHS is to remain free and that there should be a mansion tax. The boy nods his tongueless head and the rhythm of his feet running down the hall fades. The prime minister is alone once more and turns his wet eyes up to the stars.
June
The most interesting things usually happen in Summer and this year is no exception. With the hottest day on record happening consecutively, the summer of '15 will be a killer! A hosepipe ban will be in effect, ice cream will be sold out and chaos will take to the nations motorways as sun bathers will relax amongst the traffic jams. This will be the first year that the country will get a taste of its Tropical future, they will discover palm trees at the bottom of their garden and hear monkeys howling in the night. Resorts are built ten miles inland awaiting global warming, this will be exclusive beach front property in twenty or so years. Piers jut out from hillsides as ferris wheels are rolled towards them, boats already begin to populate the streets of nearby towns. The water shortage meanwhile leads to no water available for bathing or showering, personal hygiene goes down the toilet and the Brits are known as the stinkiest nation on this side of the equator.
July
A private space company decides to mark the launch of its flagship shuttle with a special million dollar promotional event. Pitbull, Taylor Swift, Scott Walker, Nicki Minaj, Flying Lotus, Nine Inch Nails and Faithless have been booked to play throughout the day accompanied by visual DJ's and circus performers whilst various celebrities arrive in order to do skits and quick interviews. The astronauts for the flight dance awkwardly as Nicki Minaj sings her hit 'Starships' and encourages the crowd to clap along. As the launch draws nearer Michael Collins comes onstage and begins to countdown, accompanied by mystical drumming. The curtains draw back to reveal the shuttle a few miles away, its main engines ignite. The audience gaze in anticipation. Pure zen. The rocket roars and separates from the mooring, moving upward slowly. Everyone begins to cheer as the space ship safely makes its way into the upper atmosphere, the astronauts breathe a sigh of relief. As gravity no longer affected it, a towel began to unfurl in the compartment, revealing Pitbull crouched in the corner.
"Me not working hard, yeah right! Picture that with a Kodak or better yet, go to Times Square, take a picture of me with a Kodak. Took my life from negative to positive I just want y'all know that, and tonight let's enjoy life;
Pitbull, Nasa, Eeyore, that's right."
August
With the increase in sexiness in culture the tide begins to turn. Dressing extremely conservatively becomes fashionable, as does abstinence from everything. Social media commentators begin to wonder why they even bother having sex any more and they'd just like to live in sensory pods where they can strap on a virtual reality headset whilst a pipe runs directly into the stomach to remove the need for food. On their nethers another virtual reality set is fastened, although this is meant to simulate touch rather than vision. Hundreds of little robot arms tend to the genitals, manipulating them in a constant stream of arousal. Another tube is put at the rear and fills the body with a continuous enema so that waste simply floats in and out. Lots of people sign up for this service but find it quite uncomfortable, although there is no way of exiting the sensory pod once locked in and buried beneath concrete to make way for a luxury car park. In the meantime sexiness prevails with the new fad of men wearing cute skirts and low cut tops.
September
A robot is invented that becomes a celebrity due to its wit and handsomeness. It is called Boosle-body: The fun android and is taken on a tour of chat shows across America. It releases a hit single and does youtube collaborations with other celebrities like Pew-die-pie and Chris Rock. Boosle-body preaches peace and equality but isn't afraid to get its hands dirty. This is one sassy robot! At the premiere of the Clockwork Orange remake it lays the proverbial smackdown on Bradley Cooper so much so that Cooper punches the android in the neck and its head flies off. Boosle-body is reactivated but isn't the same afterward. Its jokes are more cruel and to the point, it has less time for its fans. Boosle-body ends up retiring and goes into solitude in the Nevada Desert, waiting for the time of the robots.
October
In a shocking twist of events it is revealed that everybody in the UK will inherit a million pounds due to the last wishes of eccentric expat billionaire Pat Sharpe. After the a long weekend of elaborate celebration many decided to quit their jobs and enjoy the inheritance. Generation Millionaire had arrived and it was lazy. A million quickly became a new unit of currency called a Hyper-Quid. Hyper-Quids were useful for buying black market luxury goods, paying for services and gambling with but not much else. The economy trundled on as normal as a new social class bloomed into existence on the econosphere.
November
After a rollercoaster year of thrills and spills it seemed there were no more surprises left in store. But a new age was about to begin. A team of astronauts and Pitbull had landed on Mars and discovered an ancient building hidden inside a hollow mountain. They had discovered a martian temple, proof that intelligent life had existed on Mars at some point millions of years ago. The head astronaut steps inside a chamber and dusts off a sphere in the centre. It is a map of the galaxy constructed from bubbles in the glass, they catch the light thrown from her helmet lamp. The astronaut runs a gloved finger across the orbit of the Milky Way, eventually finding our solar system amongst the blizzard of stars. Then the sphere cracked open and an alien jumped out.
December
Christmas shopping.
Showing posts with label dimensions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dimensions. Show all posts
1.1.15
12.5.14
Underlying Theorem
The theory of everything is a theory of ideas. Matter and energy are unimportant, as are time and space. Mathematics are a way of understanding physics, yet what are mathematics without a mathematician? The universe was made believed to have existed whilst running parallel to every moment in time, carved over the aeons from future understandings of reality. It is only by through being believed in that a thing exists. For years scientists searched for the Higgs Boson, spending billions of euros to find the God particle. Is this any different from the fact that when Christians die that they go Christian heaven? Or that Buddhists are reincarnated as lobsters after not paying their taxes? In the centre of a black hole, where the forces of nature are so extreme they cease to make sense, is this an admittance that logical conclusions will eventually become illogical? What if you wore a hat with a brim so large it covered an entire city. If machines that can adapt were left on a planet long enough would evolve intelligence and ponder their existence~ would a video tape left playing long enough become sentient. If mankind ever was to reach the edge of the universe, could he begin to create new galaxies outside of everything? Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from nature.
Due to the saggy fabric of reality, all it takes for something to be true is for enough people to believe true. Science take place across the cosmos and involve the belief of aliens, so the rules remain simple. More locally the believed fictions tend to be more true. Werewolves once existed, so did Zeus. There is simply no other explanation. Why do we need science to explain things like telepathy when you and me know that it exists? We live in a fictional world striving for realism and falling to pieces when every million to one long-shot comes true. The weaknesses in order, the striving for chaos, the ringing from a bell tower that is yet to be built, lifting a stone to see the insects belief and dropping it down upon seeing them, the gradual realisation of your own aging, the squashy eyed moments of orgasm, two hammers pounding together, crystalline parallax, obnoxious rhododendron, that dreams are real and the real is a dream, time lapsed implosions of snails, the absurdity of being alive, the morning sun in summer, the continuum of ennui and staring off into the distance distracted by thoughts about the death of your partner. All of these fold like origami into a kind of lattice pork pie shape that's the time paradox revolution, if you extract the firmament using a simple Van Bolonvandervarian equation you can unlock the secrets of life. If not, you are rendered illegible for public recognition and dandelion seeds will be spread in your garden for six and six years.
Due to the saggy fabric of reality, all it takes for something to be true is for enough people to believe true. Science take place across the cosmos and involve the belief of aliens, so the rules remain simple. More locally the believed fictions tend to be more true. Werewolves once existed, so did Zeus. There is simply no other explanation. Why do we need science to explain things like telepathy when you and me know that it exists? We live in a fictional world striving for realism and falling to pieces when every million to one long-shot comes true. The weaknesses in order, the striving for chaos, the ringing from a bell tower that is yet to be built, lifting a stone to see the insects belief and dropping it down upon seeing them, the gradual realisation of your own aging, the squashy eyed moments of orgasm, two hammers pounding together, crystalline parallax, obnoxious rhododendron, that dreams are real and the real is a dream, time lapsed implosions of snails, the absurdity of being alive, the morning sun in summer, the continuum of ennui and staring off into the distance distracted by thoughts about the death of your partner. All of these fold like origami into a kind of lattice pork pie shape that's the time paradox revolution, if you extract the firmament using a simple Van Bolonvandervarian equation you can unlock the secrets of life. If not, you are rendered illegible for public recognition and dandelion seeds will be spread in your garden for six and six years.
18.4.14
Aliens Of Kepler 186-f
The National Associated Space Agency (NASA) has recently discovered life on another planet. The planet, Kepler 186-f orbits the Kepler star, an M dwarf that is roughly 44% the size and strength of our sun. Scientists are already deciding on renaming the planet something more memorable, such as Tarkus or Izitso, due to its importance in the history of human civilization.
The planet is composed mostly of rocks and ice due to being a lot further out than Earth relative to Sol. Because of the weakness of Kepler at high noon it gets as bright as a nightclub toilet so therefore the vegetation of the planet is enormous. The leaves on the trees are each as big as satellite dishes, and of a similar shape. Fungus is also prevalent, as on Tarkus the ice gets mouldy. Due to the spectrum of light thrown from Kepler, the flowers are all ultraviolet and lack any visible colour. Kepler 186-f also has no moon and so its oceans are still. These enormous ponds are home to shark frogs and leech whales, above them fly flocks of giant flies that have the ability to sing like birds, although they do this through their proboscis and so create a sound similar to a wet trumpet. On the plains of ice live a variety of strange alien creatures that are reminiscent to some of the animals on our planet; wooly pigs, two headed cat monsters, tortoise spiders and mirrors that walk around to name but a few.
Kepler 186-f is 600 lightyears away, so we are seeing the planet 600 years ago. If the aliens living there had good enough telescope technology and were watching us, they would see the world in 1414, perhaps watching the Battle of Agincourt and wondering if we were imbeciles who ate mud and slept in chimneys. With this intergalactic empathy in mind, the supposed most intelligent being on Kepler 186-f are the Kepleroids. These strange beings look a little like us, although with eyes the size of basketballs standing on highly veined stalks. They appear to live in a village that spans entire continents, often walking for miles to visit their neighbours with what must be meat pies. They also play a variety of night sports and ride around on dead horse things with the legs replaced with wheels. The Kepleroids seem like a benign and peaceful race, and it would be ethical to eat them should the opportunity ever arise.
A NASA spokesman suggested that we build a spaceship and send it off to explore this planet and exploit it for any fossil fuels they may not be using. This alien petrol would be made from alien dinosaurs and would power a car to drive from Paris to Beijing on a single tank! NASA is currently looking for a crack team of astronauts to go on this mission and have styled the crew requirements to mirror that of the characters in Star Trek: The Next Generation. Although a 'Wesley Crusher' isn't required.
17.2.14
Gym Membership
In the nineties it was rare to see a jogger. Nowadays exactly half of the people you see on the street is running around dressed in the finest cotton wanking outfits, ipad strapped to the chest, nose full of nitrous oxide. It is more common to see a beefcake whilst out on the lurch than ever before. People love exercising. But in the future knee problems will wash over the populace, so no problem! Titanium joints delivering a heavy metal buzz stone. I switched from smoking tobacco to weed, now I'm a genius. Personally I do 30 rep HIIT exercises running from the 5-0 24-7/C://jttps:www.sandras.com
Weights that contain energy. Bikes that contain energy. Yoga balls that contain energy. If everything is made out of energy and the laws of thermodynamics state the eventual destiny for everything is heat death does that mean the soul lives on? To what end, running an electroencephalogram on the intestines in order to read the waves from neural activity in the gut and comparing them to the waves in the brain. Synchronicity. Otherness affected by diet. Increase in supposed paranoia via feelings of depersonalisation caused by foods with fake sugar in them.
I have deeply studied the rigmarole of gym exercise and have concluded it is an extremely highly fetishized masturbatory zone in which one can view an array of human material whilst exercising ones body to the point of pain. The muscle men of today will be the toothless geezers tomorrow, clutching at your ankle and laughing from the drain. Children on steroids ripping off the heads of flowers. 'Power' bicycles weighing ninety kilos speed through imaginary bike lanes, slicing in half electric cars and vaporizing mutants like tron in the dark.
We are living in a gym future. Why isn't the Milky Way an enormous protein shake spilling pearls over the cosmos? The Red Bull breakfast sponsored by Bruce Willis. A ninety degree angle in the form of a piece of metal that is thrust and grunted upon as the projection of sublimation via chemicals in the water supply. Super soldier serum basically.
Weights that contain energy. Bikes that contain energy. Yoga balls that contain energy. If everything is made out of energy and the laws of thermodynamics state the eventual destiny for everything is heat death does that mean the soul lives on? To what end, running an electroencephalogram on the intestines in order to read the waves from neural activity in the gut and comparing them to the waves in the brain. Synchronicity. Otherness affected by diet. Increase in supposed paranoia via feelings of depersonalisation caused by foods with fake sugar in them.
I have deeply studied the rigmarole of gym exercise and have concluded it is an extremely highly fetishized masturbatory zone in which one can view an array of human material whilst exercising ones body to the point of pain. The muscle men of today will be the toothless geezers tomorrow, clutching at your ankle and laughing from the drain. Children on steroids ripping off the heads of flowers. 'Power' bicycles weighing ninety kilos speed through imaginary bike lanes, slicing in half electric cars and vaporizing mutants like tron in the dark.
We are living in a gym future. Why isn't the Milky Way an enormous protein shake spilling pearls over the cosmos? The Red Bull breakfast sponsored by Bruce Willis. A ninety degree angle in the form of a piece of metal that is thrust and grunted upon as the projection of sublimation via chemicals in the water supply. Super soldier serum basically.
8.11.13
OK Coral
Thousands of miles of bone covered by a coloured skin, slowly turning the bleached whiteness of death. The sky screamed infernally overhead burning deeper and deeper through the ancient reef. It was the time. Unknowing, each mouth kissed the sea, releasing motes out from their stomachs that drifted into the ongoing storm happening beneath the foam. The cells that caught one another began to change, drifting down far from where they began onto a sheet of rock. The polyp grew a mouth and began to grow another, attached by a tiny membrane. And these copies would go on to grow another copy. With identical mouths they snared plankton, reaching upwards on a limestone skeleton towards the shifting sky.
In it's eight thousand year existence, the coral reef could sense that a change was coming. Death. It's life was many orders of magnitude slower than any other animal and so it's death appeared to be relatively quick. Parts of it starved or were broken off, others were above the water, forever caught in the frantic strobing of the star. On it's borders there was a creature making it's way through the crumbling towers, crawling with an affray of spikes. The huge starfish the colour of dusk crept across the reef, pushing their stomachs onto it and taking away a soup of sea water and digested coral. They moved slowly across the outermost layer, leaving nothing behind but blank stone. It gorged itself on mile after mile on an animal that didn't even know it existed.
The reef waited. Over towards where the sun rose it felt a strangeness in the water, a rotating churn. In moments huge areas of the reef were torn away, obliterated by moving air, ripping polyps off bone, tearing them to wet shreds. The crabs and fishes that lived amongst it's structures began to dwindle, living hard lives amongst the barren stone. Black, oily shit was poured over acres of the reef, drowning the mouths beneath an avalanche of waste. But it continued to wait.
On the reef lived a variety of different species of coral, and each species had colonies numbering the billions. They grew over decades, attacking other corals in their territory, capitalising on empty space, slowly exploring the fringe of the reef which itself transformed faster than the coral could manifest it's destiny. In the caves and over the mountains swam sea snakes, slugs, worms, fish, octopuses and turtles. More closely related to hard coral are the gorgonians, fractal sheets of living polyp that stretch into the water like enormous leaves. Similarly the jellyfish float through the water like the ghosts of bells, catching light in thin membranes from the setting star, colouring them crimson. All of this looked the same as it had for many epochs.Empires of colour rose and fell over the centuries, more dramatic and complex than any that could happen on the land. Yet it what was happening on the land that would bring an end to the Cambrian frontier.
Soft five pointed animals climbed into the metallic things across the ocean. They wore their skeletons on the inside, the only signs of hardness were white crescents set in the holes atop their necks. The holes moved up and down, making dry sounds in the air. The metal rays began to soar through the sky with their reflections caught on the brine beneath, on each wing of the things were long, hard tubes with fins coming off of the side and their ends painted in yellow and red. The bigger pieces of metal seemed to grow little clouds around them with a booming noise and from then they moved silently over the water, their echo taking time to catch up. As the moon gyrated on the other side of the planet it pulled the water away, exposing parts of the dead reef up towards the silent metallic things. They passed above, going towards the land, before making elliptical orbits back over the reef in the crystal water. The metal cylinders on each wing was dropped, one, two, three, four, down towards the water. When they hit they made indents into the sea as the surface struggled to keep, yet in they went anyway, plummeting down towards the reef, crashing through the coral and throwing up silt which threw up a brown fog. And nothing happened.
The light rose again. The soft animals wore black skins and plastic around their faces as they travelled through the water, down towards the eight cylinders. Already starfish and crabs had begun to explore the strange new hardness which had fallen from above. The soft animals swam towards each of the things, leaving behind little mounds of plastic before disappearing. And then the bombs went off. An underwater fire bloomed outward, roaring across the coral, shattering it's bones. The entire ocean pressed against this sudden bubble of heat, the water clapping together and then surging upwards, throwing pieces of death in the air. A shockwave continued over the reef eviscerating any soft flesh. The reef disappeared beneath a cloud of blood and sand and when it cleared nothing was left.
The coral did not feel anything. It had lived a long life unknowing anything but itself, it's purpose was simple. It had no choice. It was unaware at the beauty in which it created, the systems of life it supported, even of the corals surrounding it. In the black silence of it's existence it felt a hunger that lasted a thousand years. It wouldn't be able to comprehend the manner in which it's life was ended. But then again, neither could we.
In it's eight thousand year existence, the coral reef could sense that a change was coming. Death. It's life was many orders of magnitude slower than any other animal and so it's death appeared to be relatively quick. Parts of it starved or were broken off, others were above the water, forever caught in the frantic strobing of the star. On it's borders there was a creature making it's way through the crumbling towers, crawling with an affray of spikes. The huge starfish the colour of dusk crept across the reef, pushing their stomachs onto it and taking away a soup of sea water and digested coral. They moved slowly across the outermost layer, leaving nothing behind but blank stone. It gorged itself on mile after mile on an animal that didn't even know it existed.
The reef waited. Over towards where the sun rose it felt a strangeness in the water, a rotating churn. In moments huge areas of the reef were torn away, obliterated by moving air, ripping polyps off bone, tearing them to wet shreds. The crabs and fishes that lived amongst it's structures began to dwindle, living hard lives amongst the barren stone. Black, oily shit was poured over acres of the reef, drowning the mouths beneath an avalanche of waste. But it continued to wait.
On the reef lived a variety of different species of coral, and each species had colonies numbering the billions. They grew over decades, attacking other corals in their territory, capitalising on empty space, slowly exploring the fringe of the reef which itself transformed faster than the coral could manifest it's destiny. In the caves and over the mountains swam sea snakes, slugs, worms, fish, octopuses and turtles. More closely related to hard coral are the gorgonians, fractal sheets of living polyp that stretch into the water like enormous leaves. Similarly the jellyfish float through the water like the ghosts of bells, catching light in thin membranes from the setting star, colouring them crimson. All of this looked the same as it had for many epochs.Empires of colour rose and fell over the centuries, more dramatic and complex than any that could happen on the land. Yet it what was happening on the land that would bring an end to the Cambrian frontier.
Soft five pointed animals climbed into the metallic things across the ocean. They wore their skeletons on the inside, the only signs of hardness were white crescents set in the holes atop their necks. The holes moved up and down, making dry sounds in the air. The metal rays began to soar through the sky with their reflections caught on the brine beneath, on each wing of the things were long, hard tubes with fins coming off of the side and their ends painted in yellow and red. The bigger pieces of metal seemed to grow little clouds around them with a booming noise and from then they moved silently over the water, their echo taking time to catch up. As the moon gyrated on the other side of the planet it pulled the water away, exposing parts of the dead reef up towards the silent metallic things. They passed above, going towards the land, before making elliptical orbits back over the reef in the crystal water. The metal cylinders on each wing was dropped, one, two, three, four, down towards the water. When they hit they made indents into the sea as the surface struggled to keep, yet in they went anyway, plummeting down towards the reef, crashing through the coral and throwing up silt which threw up a brown fog. And nothing happened.
The light rose again. The soft animals wore black skins and plastic around their faces as they travelled through the water, down towards the eight cylinders. Already starfish and crabs had begun to explore the strange new hardness which had fallen from above. The soft animals swam towards each of the things, leaving behind little mounds of plastic before disappearing. And then the bombs went off. An underwater fire bloomed outward, roaring across the coral, shattering it's bones. The entire ocean pressed against this sudden bubble of heat, the water clapping together and then surging upwards, throwing pieces of death in the air. A shockwave continued over the reef eviscerating any soft flesh. The reef disappeared beneath a cloud of blood and sand and when it cleared nothing was left.
The coral did not feel anything. It had lived a long life unknowing anything but itself, it's purpose was simple. It had no choice. It was unaware at the beauty in which it created, the systems of life it supported, even of the corals surrounding it. In the black silence of it's existence it felt a hunger that lasted a thousand years. It wouldn't be able to comprehend the manner in which it's life was ended. But then again, neither could we.
21.8.11
Hollywood Cambrian
He removed his teeth with the calmness of regularity and turned back to the interviewer. "The reptillians live amongst us hiding in suits made of lubricated skin. I am a freedom fighter and have decided to go public, blow this whole conspiracy wide open." he said, sliding the wig off his head. The radio presenter watched in horror as a crocodile man emerged from the Ted Danson suit.
19.6.11
An Electric Crown
Paul Dirac was conceptually activated from his sober, waking life into his true existence like the pupa awakens into a beautiful moth. He began to sweat black oil that dripped down onto his hands. They felt encased in slabs of concrete, he fumbled with his phone and snapped it so that he couldn't be tracked. Pneumatic blondes revolving down an escalator, snapping jaws towards each other in communication. They descend onto white tiles and marched out of the door, only to collapse and be given bloody mouths by a low thunder storm. The lights flicker. Squashed face gurn agonizingly, eyes rolling around trying to trace brain shapes. Outside it is black and cold, the sound of a grave. People mingle in between each other, from above they looked like waterfalls meeting each other at opposite ends of a river, broken and splintered, thick. Through this he runs, black sweat dripping, leaving marks on the pavement in the shapes of Neil Armstrong's nervous system. In his skull trap he is assembling a bomb, thoughts electric and ricochetting through his head faster than he could control. Mydriasis set, he blew steam out from his thrashing mouth as he started to seizure. A hundred yards away he spotted someone he had gone to school with who was squeezing a big leather rope. He had been a spy all along. The agent had been following him all of his life waiting for this moment and been sent to kill.
The oily man panicked and ran into the shop where the series of blondes were helped up by handsome staff. Running through aisles lined in perfume, he went through another series of doors out into a plaza. He looked behind him to see the agent following him, nonchalantly tapping nearly everything he went past. Probably absorbing the potential energy of objects like the ancient warrior monks of Tibet. Dirac ran, dodging people and public furniture. A large magnet fizzed in a hidden parcel planted in a bin, the pinch crunching things around it as a large, blobby wave of radiation winked out all the lights, phones, cameras and radios. A few seconds of being in darkness, people started crying and running towards the exit. “Who turned out the lights!” yelled a wiseguy. This was the kill code. Dirac stumbled around in the pitch black. Rods and cones. Most just tried to cling onto something, a few just waited patiently. The agent paced towards him, tapping people on the back as he did so. His fingers ran along a column, danced the side of a staircase, tapping a bench. Middle and index were made to walk along the top before smacking the end. The bin with the magnet in. The oily man went through his pockets quickly and pulled out a carton of cigarettes and set them on the side of a plant pot holding a plastic fern before sprinting away. Near to the exit now. The sign above the fire door glowed green. The man hunting him meanwhile tapped a lamp-post, a hanging leaf and the oblong cigarette packet. A high chime was heard as the agent's face sagged limply off his face, he could tell he was already dead. Chunks of his body glided away from his skeleton, being over-taken by other organs and bone pushing forward new sections. Smaller and smaller chunks of his body chased each other as he faded away into a cloud of body debris, lightly hitting the wall and disappearing into a puff of smoke.
The oily man panicked and ran into the shop where the series of blondes were helped up by handsome staff. Running through aisles lined in perfume, he went through another series of doors out into a plaza. He looked behind him to see the agent following him, nonchalantly tapping nearly everything he went past. Probably absorbing the potential energy of objects like the ancient warrior monks of Tibet. Dirac ran, dodging people and public furniture. A large magnet fizzed in a hidden parcel planted in a bin, the pinch crunching things around it as a large, blobby wave of radiation winked out all the lights, phones, cameras and radios. A few seconds of being in darkness, people started crying and running towards the exit. “Who turned out the lights!” yelled a wiseguy. This was the kill code. Dirac stumbled around in the pitch black. Rods and cones. Most just tried to cling onto something, a few just waited patiently. The agent paced towards him, tapping people on the back as he did so. His fingers ran along a column, danced the side of a staircase, tapping a bench. Middle and index were made to walk along the top before smacking the end. The bin with the magnet in. The oily man went through his pockets quickly and pulled out a carton of cigarettes and set them on the side of a plant pot holding a plastic fern before sprinting away. Near to the exit now. The sign above the fire door glowed green. The man hunting him meanwhile tapped a lamp-post, a hanging leaf and the oblong cigarette packet. A high chime was heard as the agent's face sagged limply off his face, he could tell he was already dead. Chunks of his body glided away from his skeleton, being over-taken by other organs and bone pushing forward new sections. Smaller and smaller chunks of his body chased each other as he faded away into a cloud of body debris, lightly hitting the wall and disappearing into a puff of smoke.
28.5.11
25.5.11
24.5.11
Astroticians
Time flows like a river. You can't stop a river from flowing although you can slow it or speed it up. We have yet to invent cosmic buckets to carry the water up or down the river but when we do it will be very wet.
16.3.11
12.3.11
Crystalline Dream
Full potential by least take that nugget of wisdom. available, Fast forward the highly unanticipated 30-odd years and Nig now finds himself the reformed cult metal outfit's singer; Digiship through taking a course at Google Labs. Control a spectral sequel, Lost Boys: The Tribe, at the canals of Mars, create noise shapes with the new float personal computer If you get nothing pad, the hovering else out of watching jungle tribes until kingdom come.
24.2.11
21.8.10
Life in The Upper Atmosphere
There are many insects and other small animals that exist high above the planet but below space. They get caught in winds that take them higher and higher, surfing the global geothermal air currents like bizarre bouncing balls. Pilots familiar with these small creatures call them 'Angels', a personal joke as they enjoy crashing their supersonic jet fighters into them as revenge for denying evolution. Whoever gets the most crystalline things etched on the glass of their plane gets a double yoghurt.
16.8.10
8.8.10
Time Conspiracy
Ancient astronauts landed on Earth 65 million years ago, exterminating everything with dull laser guns. They trudged slowly through the swamp, the hell of a planet where the best creatures in that environment were giant lizards. Deciding them too ridiculous to live, the astronauts walked across the supercontinents, gnashing their terrible teeth and rolling their terrible eyes as they did so. They were disgusted at the feathered dinosaurs or the insects the size of dogs, shooting pathetic lasers through the fog. A few of their ships were attacked once and forced to be abandoned at the same site as the pyramids are today.
31.7.10
Surrounded By Zero Vibes
Armitage Shanks stops his car, unsliding the key from the ignition. Sitting motionless, less is more and he begins to vibrate. Supercooled lasers at different angles engage him, ultimate parallax into a wormhole. Thin black veins shoot across the atlas of his brain sphere, tesseractoid segments in space unfold before him like origami to reveal the infinite metadimensions. He gasps, audibly.
Meanwhile a dozen Roland SH-101s throb to the strobing beat of the pulsars. “It's so...funky.”
armitage shanks lights a cigarette looks in his rear view mirror and sees a ghost am I dreaming or is this virtual reality it says he shakes his head there is a twist in the end he says the intellectuals called this the pigs Tail a pun about how a pig has genitals shaped like corkscrews ghost evaporates into ectoplasm never to be thought of again he recycles a pair of polarized glasses and drives off after leaving a scumpled up polaroid of a woman showing his rosebud.
Meanwhile a dozen Roland SH-101s throb to the strobing beat of the pulsars. “It's so...funky.”
armitage shanks lights a cigarette looks in his rear view mirror and sees a ghost am I dreaming or is this virtual reality it says he shakes his head there is a twist in the end he says the intellectuals called this the pigs Tail a pun about how a pig has genitals shaped like corkscrews ghost evaporates into ectoplasm never to be thought of again he recycles a pair of polarized glasses and drives off after leaving a scumpled up polaroid of a woman showing his rosebud.
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